Episode 491 – Barely a News Podcast

In Germany, Heiligabend, or Christmas Eve, is said to be a magical time when the pure in heart can hear animals talking. They can also see that rivers turn into wine, Christmas tree blossoms bear fruit, mountains open, revealing gems hidden inside and bell ringing can be heard from the bottom of the sea. The beer is strong…

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Factoid of the Week:
Rudolph’s red nose is probably the result of a parasitic infection of his respiratory system. According to Roger Highfield, the author of the book “The Physics of Christmas: From the Aerodynamics of Reindeer to the Thermodynamics of Turkey” the world’s most famous reindeer has a red nose due to a parasite. However, Rudolf’s relationship with his parasite is symbiotic: after all, the red nose illuminates the path through the winter night for the whole reindeer team.

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Words of Wisdom:
There’s naught, no doubt, so much the spirit calms as rum and true religion. -Lord Byron

Episode 490 – Goldfish Memory

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 The song ‘Jingle Bells’ was written in 1857 by James Lord Pierpont and published under the title “One Horse Open Sleigh”. It was supposed to be played in the composer’s Sunday school class during Thanksgiving as a way to commemorate the famed Medford sleigh races. 

“Jingle Bells” was also the first song to be broadcast from space.

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
“Jingle Bells” was written for Thanksgiving, not Christmas.

Russian cows get VR headsets ‘to reduce anxiety’
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Electric eel powers Christmas tree lights at Tennessee aquarium

Words of Wisdom:
I detest ‘Jingle Bells,’ ‘White Christmas,’ ‘Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer,’ and the obscene spending bonanza that nowadays seems to occupy not just December, but November and much of October, too. – Richard Dawkins

Episode 489 – Fairly Well Known Streamers

I may have ordered a spicy dish of lamb and noodles at a dumpling place tonight. It was like eating a delicious hive of bees… and I may actually die later.

TELL US WHAT YOU’RE THANKFUL FOR! Send emails, tweets, space-plasma messages (those are a thing, right?)

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
No forks at the first Thanksgiving! The first Thanksgiving was eaten with spoons and knives — but no forks! That’s right, forks weren’t even introduced to the Pilgrims until 10 years later and weren’t a popular utensil until the 18th century.

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Words of Wisdom:
“Pride slays thanksgiving, but a humble mind is the soil out of which thanks naturally grow. A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he gets as much as he deserves.”– Henry Ward Beecher

Episode 488 – Surprise Testicle

This week, I am thankful that Sub is here! He got to fly in and spend the week with us, and it’s been great!

The poor kid is prolly traumatized now, however >_>

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
Abraham Lincoln proclaimed Thanksgiving a national holiday on October 3, 1863. Sarah Joseph Hale, the woman who wrote “Mary Had A Little Lamb,” convinced Lincoln to make Thanksgiving a national holiday after writing letters for 17 years.

South African gin company infuses their alcohol with elephant dung
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YouTuber’s gender reveal goes viral as Paige Ginn farts coloured powder

Words of Wisdom:
Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings. -William Arthur Ward

Episode 487 – Steviana Jones and the Temple of Ash

In Medieval Europe, owls were thought to be witches, and to hear an owl’s call meant someone was about to die (fun). The word “witch” comes from the Old English wicce, meaning “wise woman.” In fact, wiccan were highly respected people at one time. According to popular belief, witches held one of their two main meetings, or sabbats, on Halloween night.

In Medieval Europe, owls were thought to be witches, and to hear an owl’s call meant someone was about to die (fun). The word “witch” comes from the Old English wicce, meaning “wise woman.” In fact, wiccan were highly respected people at one time. According to popular belief, witches held one of their two main meetings, or sabbats, on Halloween night.

Speaking of things that represent Halloween, ever wonder where the typical Halloween colors came from? Orange is a symbol of strength and endurance and, along with brown and gold, stands for the harvest and autumn. Black is typically a symbol of death and darkness and acts as a reminder that Halloween once was a festival that marked the boundaries between life and death.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN, DORKS!

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
During the pre-Halloween celebration of Samhain, bonfires were lit to ensure the sun would return after the long, hard winter. Often Druid priests would throw the bones of cattle into the flames and, hence, “bone fire” became “bonfire.”

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Man Sticks Cannabis In His Nose, Forgets About It For 18 Years

Words of Wisdom:
It makes sense that a witch lives in a swamp. -Jordan Peterson

Episode 486 – Your Children Are Sinners

A group of boys pushing through a crowd at a Halloween party in the 1930s.

The Great Depression was a time of great economic and social change that affected many parts of American life—including Halloween. Parents, concerned about their sons running amok on All Hallows’ Eve, organized “haunted houses” or “trails” to keep them off the streets.

Halloween had long been a night of revelry for adults and children, seen as a positive outlet for young men to blow off steam. This ranged from stealing neighbors’ gates off their hinges to stealing dead bodies. In 1879, about 200 boys in Kentucky stopped a train by laying a dead body across the railroad tracks. In 1900, medical students at the University of Michigan stole a headless corpse from the anatomy lab and propped it up against the building’s front doors.

There were plenty of people who didn’t see this as harmless fun before the Great Depression. However, the economic disaster exacerbated young men’s Halloween antics, leading to increased public concern and anger. In 1933, parents were outraged when hundreds of teenage boys flipped over cars, sawed off telephone poles and engaged in other acts of vandalism across the country. People began to refer to that year’s holiday as “Black Halloween,” similarly to the way they referred to the stock market crash four years earlier as “Black Tuesday.”

“This is the only evening on which a boy can feel free to play pranks outdoors without danger of being ‘pinched,’ and it is his delight to scare passing pedestrians, ring door-bells, and carry off the neighbors’ gates,” espoused one boys’ craft guide. According to the guide, even if a boy had to fetch the gate he stole out of the tree he left it in, “the punishment is nothing compared with the sports the pranks have furnished him.”

Some cities considered banning Halloween altogether. Yet in many communities, the response was to organize Halloween activities for young people so that they didn’t run amok. They started to organize trick-or-treating, parties, costume parades—and yes—haunted houses to keep them busy.

“Hang old fur, strips of raw liver on walls, where one feels his way to dark steps,” advised a 1937 party pamphlet on how to create a “trail of terror.” “Weird moans and howls come from dark corners, damp sponges and hair nets hung from the ceiling touch his face… Doorways are blockaded so that guests must crawl through a long dark tunnel.”

These early American haunted houses were small, non-profit affairs held in residential neighborhoods. In later decades, larger organizations began to host their own haunted houses as fundraisers or commercial attractions. The most famous and influential one was Disneyland’s Haunted Mansion in 1969, which had an extremely high production value for its day.Since then, America’s haunted attractions have become more and more elaborate.

Now, there are over 1,200 haunted attractions that charge admission fees.

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
The Great Depression spawned Haunted Houses as we know them today.

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Haunted House Info
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Words of Wisdom:
What terrified me will terrify others; and I need only describe the spectre which had haunted my midnight pillow. -Mary Shelley

Episode 485 – Wet Anus > Dirty Anus

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Scottish girls hung wet sheets in front of the fire on the holiday to see images of their future husband. Young women would also peel an apple, often at midnight, in one strip and throw it over their shoulder. The strip was supposed to land in the shape of the first letter of her future husband’s name. In colonial America, Halloween’s bobbing for apples was a fortune-telling game: the first person to get the apple without using his or her hands would be the first to marry.

People also used to bake Halloween cakes with a ring and a thimble inside. Get the slice with the ring and you would be married within the year. The thimble? You’d be unlucky in love.

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
The history of Halloween includes a lot of romance

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Oklahoma man driving stolen vehicle caught with rattlesnake, uranium, whiskey and firearm

Words of Wisdom:
Luck is not chance, it’s toil; fortune’s expensive smile is earned. -Emily Dickinson

Episode 484 – Grabbin’ The Goozle

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Having children dress up in costume and go door-to-door like little beggars demanding treats is kind of weird. Like several other Halloween activities, the tradition can be traced back to the Middle Ages and the rituals of Samhain. It was believed that ghosts and spirits walked the Earth on the night of Samhain, so people would dress up as spirits themselves in an effort to fool the real deal into thinking they were one and the same.

This act was called “guising.” As the Catholic Church started supplanting pagan festivals with their own holidays (like All Saints’ Day), the act of guising became popular and poor children and adults would go door to door dressed as angels or spirits on Hallowmas begging for food or money in exchange for songs and prayers. This was called “souling.” The earliest known reference to the phrase “trick-or-treat” in North America is from 1927 in Alberta, Canada.  

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

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Factoid of the Week:
Trick-or-treating comes from“souling”

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Family on South Carolina vacation pulls 44 pounds of cocaine from ocean

Words of Wisdom:
I don’t know that there are real ghosts and goblins, But there are always more trick-or-treaters than neighborhood kids. -Robert Breault

Episode 483 – Traumatized By Meat

Image result for jackolanternLegend has it that Stingy Jack invited the devil to have a drink with him, but Jack didn’t want to pay for the drink so he convinced the devil to turn himself into a coin. Instead of buying the drink, he pocked the coin and kept it close to a silver cross in his house, so the devil couldn’t take shape again. He promised to let the devil go as long as he would leave him alone for a year – and if Jack died that the devil wouldn’t claim his soul.

After a year, Jack tricked the devil again to leave him alone and not claim his soul. Basically, the devil is really gullible in this story. When Jack died, God didn’t want such a conniving person in heaven, and the devil true to his word (what a good guy) would not allow him into hell.

Jack was sent off into the night with only a burning coal to light his path. He placed the coal inside a carved-out turnip and has been roaming the earth ever since. People in Ireland and Scotland began creating their own creations of Jack’s lanterns out of turnips, beets and potatoes. The tradition came to the United States along with the immigrants and people began to use pumpkins, native to North America, for the lanterns instead.

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

If you really dig what we do, be sure to leave us a review on whatever podcast service you use.  It helps us out a ton!

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Factoid of the Week:
“Jack o’lantern” comes from the Irish legend of Stingy Jack. 

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Words of Wisdom:
“Magic is really very simple, all you’ve got to do is want something and then let yourself have it.” – Aggie Cromwell, Halloweentown (1998)

Episode 482 – Christmas Reach Around

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Have you guys ever tried retying hammock knots? It’s not easy, Man (lawl). But, seriously, I screwed up our hammock real hard core. My dad bought it 30 years ago, and never used it… so he gave it to Jacob and me. It had loosened up over the last several decades, so I decided to give it a bit of a spruce up.

That was dumb.

Now, it lilts sideways because I didn’t make the knots even… so it is constantly trying to flip you out of one direction.

Sigh.

Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE!  Even your grandmother!  She needs penis jokes too! 

If you really dig what we do, be sure to leave us a review on whatever podcast service you use.  It helps us out a ton!

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Factoid of the Week:
Mayans were clever folk. They developed the only known written language in Mesoamerica, gave chocolate a God long before Europeans even knew it existed, and they invented the hammock! Yup, hammocks were originally woven from the Hammack tree, native to Latin America, hence the name, “hammock

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Words of Wisdom:
Your best ideas, those eureka moments that turn the world upside down, seldom come when you’re juggling emails, rushing to meet the 5 P.M. deadline or straining to make your voice heard in a high-stress meeting. They come when you’re walking the dog, soaking in the bath or swinging in a hammock. -Carl Honore