Episode 14 – “The Only Good Kitty is a Shaved Kitty”

And Stephen and I are back again in all our insulting glory! We have rabid foxes, pissed grannies, vampyr peacocks, and a wicked contest for our listeners in this episode. We spent all of an hour trolling the net to bring you these gems of stupidity, and we know you will enjoy… because we know where you live. We hope our listeners from the USA enjoyed the fourth this week, but be warned: any drunken act of stupidity on your part might just land you on our show.
Factoid of the Week:
The amount of carbon in the human body could fill about 9,000 pencils 

Anti-Violence rally turns to violence
Book-toting granny pegs thief
Cafe hires only the sexy… for charity
Man beats peacock to death, proclaims it is a vampire
Would you like a slice of pr0n with that?
Garden gnomes are Fl’s weapon of choice
Angelina’s Boobies make you smart
Dinner guest finds more than peas in the freeZer
Blinded by love
Man with shyte-iest luck on earth
5-year-old pwns rabid fox

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Running Time: 40 Minutes

Episode 13 – “Yippee Ki Yay, MotherWAAAHHHHH”

We humbly submit episode 13, literally jam packed with lesbians, bears, cows, and pissed 6-year-olds with shovels. Stephen and I have scoured the internet for morons and their heart-warming stories that make the rest of us feel less stupid. This is the last episode that Stephen and Ashley will be doing in the same location for a while, because Ashley is a putz and going back to school. Skype to the rescue!
Factoid of the Week:
It would take 14.3 Billion fireflies to generate the visible brightness of the sun

Cops called over wedding dress feud
Sheep hired at lawn cutters
Muggers leave calling card
Wife replaced by cow’s head
Idiot tries to sell stolen car… to owner
Florida man’s headache solved by discovery of a bullet
Man throws log at bear and kills it, saving family
Two women accused of having sex in a bathroom in front of a child
Naked man expunged from salon
Man purchases a plasma tv for $4.88 from Wal-Mart
Why women shouldn’t drive

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Running Time: 38 Minutes

Episode 12 – “Your Face is Huge”

Another face-melting episode of Horseshoes & Hand Grenades is out, ready to make your self esteem rise to super hero like levels! That’s right, we’re bringing you fresh, new, human stupidity that will make you feel like you could do no wrong! So grab yourself a BAWLS, a nice cozy chair, sit back, and prepare to be encouraged.
Factoid of the Week
In Tuscon, Arizona, potholes are officially known as pavement deficiencies

Teen Unplugs life machine… because it was noisy
18 Year Old Shoots Friend On A Dare
New York City pays $29,000 for arresting topless woman
Teen gets caught molesting a horse
Man Bursts into flames after being shot with taser gun
Couple falls to their death while having sex on roof
Pig Blood EW!
Gas tanks with teeth
Machete man looking for raccoons at Goony Golf

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Running Time: 39 Minutes

Episode 11 – “Happy Father’s Day Ya Filthy Animal”

Another late show, but with good reason! Ashley is back in Florida, which means the show was made at the super high quality that you all look for. We used our super podcast creation machine to bring you the best of odd news, without a single pop or crackle from our microphones. This episode was chock full of the news you expect, including the usual poop and sex stories. What would Horseshoes & Hand Grenades be like without that?! Enjoy the show!
Factoid of the Week
The largest fossilized dinosaur turd ever found measures 22″ x 8″ x 7.5″

German Squirrel Goes On A Rampage Before An Old Man Kills It With Cane
Missing Prisoner Found Snoring On Roof
Man Fails School Exams For 38th Time
Chinese Patients Allowed To Leave Hospital With IV Drips In Hand
Judge cries over lost pants
Blind man build bridge!
Sex Shuts down airport
Butts faces jail time… for ganking toilet paper
Myspace shot down

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Running Time: 39 Minutes

Episode 10 – “I Made Key Lime Pie…It’s Awesome”

Here is your long awaited episode 10! I know you’ve all been sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for the day that this incredible episode would grace the face of your Podcast downloading utility of choice! Well, we’ve been just as excited about unleashing it on the world. This one was awesome, and we’re very happy that it was our 10th episode. Now we can sit back, relax, and wait for the corporate sponsorships to roll in. Judging by how things are going, we’ll be waiting a while.
Sidenote: Huge thanks to authors  Robert W. Walker and Robert Tinnell for hanging out with Ashley at the Writer’s Conference this weekend! Your encouragement and kind words were very appreciated.

Factoid of the Week:
The first food to be approved by the FDA for artificial color was BUTTER….It’s not really yellow 

Museum thief gets the finger
Drunken Bishop
Georgia Man stabbed with Deer antler
Man Sues over erection…. drink
47 Cats Rescued from House Full of Feces
World’s Largest Penis Erected!
Man Drowns while trying to rescue his cell phone
Fishermen tries to save two drowning morons
Iowa man herds deer with plane

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Running Time: 39 Minutes

Don’t Panic!

Tonight’s show has been delayed! But have no fear! The show will be released on Sunday so you guys can get caught up on all the stupid crap that people on our little planet do. We wouldn’t leave you empty handed on this Friday night though! We’re just not those kind of people. So here is a little flash video made by Steve a couple years ago. It’s dedicated to the coolest guy who ever walked this planet….MC Hammer. See you guys on Sunday!
WATCH THIS!

Episode 9 – “That Transvestite was Wearing Pearls…Eww”

A very special episode of Horseshoes & Hand Grenades has been lovingly crafted once again by the coolest hosts on the net and brought forth for your listening pleasure. On this episode, we were joined by Stephanie, Stephen’s fiancé, who added quite a bit of fun to the show and had a hard time understanding what to do with the pie. You’ll get it when you listen, I promise. So check this show out, it was definitely great for us and we hope you enjoy it as much as we did!
Factoid of the Week:
On average, adults have 2 gallons of air in the space between their skin and clothes

Heart op pensioner kills snake
Brit burnt German towels
Toothpaste stolen in raid
Dead chickens hit Australia homes

Wendy’s Manager Shot Over Chili Sauce
Organist focuses on wrong organ
German bricklayer cooks guinea pig, girlfriend gets upset
McDonald’s employees busted after blowing snot on a police officer’s burger
Horse riders charged with intoxication

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Running Time: 38 Minutes

Episode OCHO – “I Guess I Breathe Through My Nose A Lot”

Another incredible episode of Horseshoes and Hand Grenades is coming at you, specifically packaged and gift wrapped for your listening pleasure! We had a lot of fun, and we hope you will too… or we’ll be forced to hunt you down and make you laugh and that would just take too much of our time :). So here’s the show!
Factoid of the Week:
It takes 720 peanuts to make a pound of peanut butter

Drunk crashes car without realizing
Wheelchair man exceeds drink-drive limit
Love driving turtles to make suicidal runs
‘Werewolf’ Burglar Gets 6 Months in Jail
Vacuum screamer
Bondage couple lose key
Man sleeps through gunshot to head
Boy kills hog bigger than the legendary Hogzilla

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Running Time: 38 Minutes

Digg us!

Hey everybody! We have an awesome special announcement to make…well awesome for us anyway! We now have our podcast registered with everybody’s favorite democratic news source, Digg.com! You can now “digg” our podcast by clicking the little “digg it” badge on the right, and also vote for each episode individually by clicking the “Digg this Story” button under each episode! This is an awesome opportunity for us to get out there, and we’d really appreciate all of your help in making this happen. You guys are the best fans ever. So get to clickin’, and help this tiny little home grown podcast become something incredible!

Episode 7 – “I be too drunk to sit!”

Another full near-40 minutes of awesomeness is coming straight at you in this latest installment of Horseshoes & Hand Grenades! Steve and Ashley take you on a journey through some of the dumbest news yet! It’s a good thing that the world breeds so many idiots, or the both of them would be out of a job. Grab yourself a pint of your finest ale and have a listen to this latest episode of Horseshoes & Hand Grenades!
Factoid of the Week:
The word “toast,” meaning a wish of good health, started in ancient Rome, where a piece of toasted bread was dropped into wine.

Bank sells home with a dead woman’s corpse inside
Passengers on an Indian commuter train forced to get out and push
Squirrel Attacks 2 Adults and 1 Child at Elementary School!
Police arrest alleged flasher
Cop’s gay porn prank backfires
Aussies go crazy for cat poo coffee
Nudists overtake small town in Vermont!
Man sticks it to the man by putting dog feces in an envelope along with a parking ticket payment

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Running Time: 37 Minutes