My daddy makes SO much food when he cooks. I’m talking food for seven people for DAYS. Combine that with my mother doing the same thing… and it looks like a thirty person picnic every time we go over to their house to eat. Also, I ate too much and I am about to die. Why am I like this. Also, also, I chased my nephew around the house for thirty minutes after eating to much so I am extra going to puke and die. Someone save me from myself. Halp.
Our show is listener supported… tell EVERYONE about the wackiness! EVERYONE! Even your grandmother! She needs penis jokes too!
If you really dig what we do, be sure to leave us a review on whatever podcast service you use. It helps us out a ton!
iTunes: http://bit.ly/hnhshow
Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/horseshoes-and-hand-grenades
Factoid of the Week:
Only about 10% of the world’s currency is physical money, the rest only exists on computers.
Indonesian province bans men and women from dining together
A Bug’s Heist: Thousands Of Insects, Spiders Stolen From Philadelphia Museum
Kuwaiti fishmonger closed for ‘sticking googly eyes on fish’
Virginia man erects electrified fence near school bus stop to keep kids off property
Words of Wisdom:
Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window. -Steve Wozniak.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSS
Women are expected to change their last names after a marriage, but I think if more men had to go through all the lame steps that a woman must go through in order to change her name… they would be on board with women just keeping their given names. Please have 56 forms of ID, that require 56 other visits to other places, please wait in line for 5 hours, then please wait 4 weeks, then please change your Driver’s License, and your credit cards, and your bank account, and every other thing that your name has ever been on ever… including your email address and all those gorgeous address label stickers you ordered a while ago. -__-
When we were children, my sister used to eat butter… and I thought it was the weirdest thing a person could do. I now realize I just did not appreciate butter as a child. I was prepping some corn to go on the grill (grilled corn requires butter), and ended up licking the butter off my fingers before washing them in the sink. I found myself wanting to shove the container of salted, creamed, cow’s milk into my face. Are butter sandwiches a thing?
I am fairly convinced a colony of gnomes live in my refrigerator. Ping, bangs, knocks, and clinks are so often emanating from the fridge, that I — at one point — thought something was trapped inside. It’s been a year since we moved in, and the constant construction noises still bother me. What is happening inside there? Are the foods alive and partying? Is ice that loud? Are there polar bears in the ice?
My fingers smell like Kalamata olives because I dumped them into a greek salad earlier… which I would be super OK with, if only it didn’t make me want to bite my fingernails! Also, the salad is legit. Massive chunks of cucumber and feta tossed with julienned basil, Kalamata olives, and halved grape tomatoes. For a dressing I tossed on EVOO, lemon juice, salt, and balsamic vinegar. Not entirely sure why I gave you that recipe, but there you go! That’s what I had for dinner tonight. Along with a piece of chocolate that no one shall mention ever again >_>
I was in the grocery store last week and I saw this woman sneaking up and down every aisle, whispering to herself and pulling things out of her bag at certain shelves before setting them down in a haphazard way. It was such odd behavior that I followed her. When I got close enough, I could tell she had an open box of cereal in her purse and was setting tiny Cheerios down, murmuring instructions to them before she would run off and repeat the process.
If you have a habit of sleeping with someone, you’ve probably had a less than enjoyable night’s sleep caused by the tempest whirling around beside you. They get hot and fling the covers off, they cannot rest and so begins a night of crocodile death rolls, or they have a wild dream and end up slapping you across the face.
Jacob’s company is doing this five week competition that can land people money for exercising… and it is glorious and going to kill me. My team is ranked 8th out of the entire fortune 100 company, and I am 2nd on my team. I also want to yell at some of the members on my team… how are you going to commit to joining a team that is logging mad exercise hours and only workout 30 mins every other day! I cannot threaten or cajole anyone because everyone knows I am Jacob’s wife and I don’t want to get his work people annoyed at him, but COME ON! Take a walk at lunch or something. Damn.
Today I beat the Trial of the Sword on BoTW and it was glorious! I didn’t realize that there were three stages (which was very helpful because of the dying). The first stage was the hardest… even though it was meant to be the baby stage to get your feet wet. It was awful. I died 7 times. That means I had to restart EIGHT TIMES before I finally made it to the last stage. The next two (17 and then 24 rooms respectively) I had to restart once a piece. I am sad now that I am done. That was fun. Again!